When Parents Die
Learning to live with the loss of a parent
The death of a parent marks an emotional and psychological watershed in a person’s life. For children and teenagers, the loss of a parent if not handled sensitively can be a lasting trauma, and for adults too, a parent’s death can be a tremendous blow.
When Parents Die speaks to bereaved children of all ages. Rebecca draws on her personal and professional understanding of parental loss, as well as the experiences of many others, to provide the reader with an honest, compassionate and insightful exploration of the experience of losing a parent. The book covers the entire course of grieving, from the immediate aftermath of the death through to the point of recovery, paying particular attention to the many circumstances that can prolong and complicate mourning, including sudden death and suicide.
An indispensable aid to the bereaved and the many professionals who work with them, When Parents Die is written in a clear and sympathetic style. It has been fully revised for this third edition to take recent research into account.
“Every young person who grieves for a dead parent will find this book speaks to them.”
DR DORA BLACK
What the Experts Say
“The only way we will ever really understand what it means to grieve is when we learn from those who are bereaved and can share their experience with us. This book is a wonderful example of how Rebecca Abrams used her own experience with death and the grief that followed to help herself and others.”
DR PHYLLIS R. SILVERMAN, Co-Principal Investigator, Harvard Child Bereavement Study, USA
“Rebecca Abrams has been talking to and helping parent-bereaved people for over twenty years and her experience is unmatched. She wears her knowledge lightly and makes no attempt to burden her readers with erudite details of research findings and theoretical models. Instead, she provides us with insights and solutions to the numerous problems and distressing feelings to which the death of a parent can give rise.”
COLIN MURRAY PARKES, OBE MD FRCPsych
What the Readers Say
“Your book has been my best friend on this sad journey. I feel like few people really understand what I feel but I found that understanding in your book. I am so grateful that you shared your story with the world. You restored hope in me. Thank you today & forever.”
ZUZANA
“I have just read your book ‘When Parents Die’ and I want to thank you. My dad died five months ago. I read a few books about bereavement but they couldn’t really ‘get’ me. Your book helped me a lot - I’ve never been so understood.”
JONATHAN, 21
“I only wish there had been a book like this available when my mother died when I was 18. As I read your book, I kept saying ‘Oh, yes!’ to myself, as you clearly and honestly tackled so many familiar themes that have been part of my life.”
ELIZABETH, 43
“At the age of 16 my life was devastated when my father committed suicide. The person who was so loving and vital a part of my life, left a mother and daughter totally stunned, shocked, distraught – I can’t find the words to explain the feelings. Your book finally made me realise I’m not the only person who has felt this way. No professional has helped me so much. You have no idea how relieved I have been reading your book, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your warming and calming words. You have truly inspired me in my outlook on life and death.”
MARY, 17
“My mother died in November. I came across your book a few days before her funeral, read a few pages, and knew I had to buy it. Thank you so much! Your book has been a great comfort to me and I’m sure it will remain so for some time to come.”
PAT, 44
“I have just finished reading your book and felt I had to tell you how profoundly moving and wonderful I think it is. I wish everyone whose parent dies could have this book.”
RACHEL, 23
Purchase
When Parents Die is available to buy in paperback, hardback and eBook editions from Routledge, Amazon, and from all good book shops.
Talks and Workshops
As an expert on parental loss in childhood and adolescence, and former bereavement counsellor for Cruse Bereavement Care and The Cheltenham Ladies’ College, Rebecca regularly speaks on this subject in schools and to health care professionals. Rebecca is available for talks and training workshops.